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Unfortunately, it’s not the result we wanted. You have Cancer. 

How many times have doctors used that phrase? It sounds like the medical equivalent of the corporate line, “he is pursuing other opportunities outside of the company?” Not that anyone would like to deliver those results. And technically, I saw the biopsy results at the same time he did via email – so we both knew at the same time. 

2025 was a year for sure. But let’s start with the good news, and work our way backward. 

First, the good news, I’m recovering well from a radical prostatectomy, where the entire prostate is removed due to prostate cancer. I’ll make a full recovery and be back to regular activities in a few weeks. All good news – I feel very fortunate to have had that diagnosis and this result.  

When I was first diagnosed, I felt like I had two basic choices: 1)keep the circle small with family/friends – plus a few people whose calendars would be impacted by my non-usual lack of responsiveness. Or, 2)be very public. The second option felt more than a little uncomfortable for me. I feel like I’m a private person, and in the early stages of any diagnosis, you really don’t know much about the outcome, and you don’t have answers to random questions people ask. So I went with option 1, keep it tight. 

I had taken a sabbatical from my last role and hadn’t decided what I would pursue next. We had a great summer off with a milestone birthday for my wife in Italy, where our oldest son was engaged on the steps overlooking Florence. Taking a few months off was the plan, I hadn’t intended to go longer than six months. With AI evolving, it felt like looking at a Netscape browser in 1993, and I didn’t want to get left behind, so I was working on vibe coding a couple of app ideas to keep my skills relevant. Then the big pause button was pushed… 

It felt like a “small c” cancer diagnosis versus a “Big C” diagnosis that could change your life span or require more extreme treatment options. Prostate cancer, when caught early, like mine, is constrained to the prostate. They use a Gleason score to grade the aggressiveness of the cancer. If the score is low, they may pursue “Active Surveillance” and wait years to take action. However, my Gleason score on just one of the six probes was high and aggressive. The risk of not treating was that the cancer could spread to other lymph nodes by proximity, then the cancer would move to other traditional stages, you hear, stage 1-4. The whole thing felt, well, a bit routine. 

My wife is a cancer survivor, now over 28 years ago, and one thing we learned about her process with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma is that when you tell someone you have cancer, you “give it to them.” Let me explain what I mean. 

We don’t talk about diagnosis and treatments in our culture. We could, and people want to help. But they don’t know what to do. Heck, the patient doesn’t know what to do, and the process slowly reveals itself over weeks (if you’re lucky) or months. And as the patient, it’s exhausting to face questions you didn’t even know were questions, or to get random advice from people who did research online and aren’t medical professionals, or can’t share from personal experience. 

Why talk about it now? Two reasons: early detection and cancer research! I’m through it, on a path to recovery. I know at some point, something will get all of us. Statistically, for men in America, you will have prostate cancer if you live long enough, but it won’t be the thing that kills you. I guess that’s good news? But you can take some action to mitigate this specific risk. 

It starts with talking about it; we need to normalize men’s health discussions and make it OK for guys to talk. I’m blessed/lucky (on the continuum of your providential point of view) – we found it early, the Doctors were great, robotic surgery was successful, etc. 

Gents, 

• Get your annual exam – at 50 or earlier. At 40, if you’re in a high-risk category, e.g., if there is a family history. I won’t comment on the “over-exam controversy” – I manage my healthcare, not someone on Reddit. 
• The Prostate-Specific Antigen (PSA) blood test is part of that exam. My PSA levels were only slightly elevated, but enough that my GP suggested I have a biopsy. 
• Yes, there are implications of this treatment, and we need to discuss them as well, but this isn’t the forum for that topic. 

Second, support cancer research as part of your giving. AACR or StandUp to Cancer is a great place to start. The progress being made in treatment is amazing. 

Finally, you don’t have to go at this alone. Through the process, I discovered a number of friends at different stages with the same cancer: 

• Still in the “Active Surveillance” stage, where it has been detected, but the cancer is still growing slowly. He’s an engineer who did way more research on the topic than I ever could, and, like many of my engineer friends, it was great to take advantage of his work! 
• One was a friend of a friend who had been through the same procedure a number of years ago and even had the same doctor, who was one I had shortlisted. It was great to talk with someone who had firsthand experience, rather than secondhand from what the Doctor had heard back. 
• One had recently had the exact same procedure. He gave my wife a big hug and let her know it would be fine.   

Thanks to that entire small group for all your support. Thanks for being there to listen, especially when I didn’t even know the questions. I’m looking forward to more cycling and golf in 2026 as well as more writing, tech, community, startups, and some travel (but not like it used to be). 

For my family, thanks for putting up with my pragmatism. We don’t need to worry about stuff until we need to! This was not that time. To my wife Kathryn, look, another thing we didn’t plan on, that we have taken on together and made it through (thanks for being there)!

Finally, I’m good. I struggle with the title of “survivor” or “fighter”… heck, it was a pretty easy procedure, with planned recovery time and very experienced doctors. But, calling me just the “cancer scheduler” feels a little flat, ;). So I’m not sure I will label it at this point – other than “relieved.” 

To those of you whom I’ve been slow to respond over the last few months, you at least know the why! I hope you never told yourself a different narrative other than, “Dave must be preoccupied by something!” Listening to the voices in your head and narratives we tell ourselves is such a great topic for another time. 

On to meaningful work! I’m still not completely sure what I’m going to do next… but at least I’ve cleared out some things that were actively taking up mental space and energy, so I’m prepping for the next chapter! Goals not yet realized. I’m looking forward to you being a part of that chapter if we cross paths. Here’s to your health and goals as we enter the New Year!